My Thoughts

Hi

It has been a long time since I wrote something in this blog.

Well, truthfully just didn't have the mood and felt like everything in this world was against me.

Work, at home, and career just weems so "lame" to me if you just know what I mean.

Well, I just sometimes worry how can I cope with the responsiblitiites of being a parent of 3 wonderful kids, with them growing and expenses always seem never ending!

Well, something must have jolted me as I watch a programme on the Secret the book and video.
It tells of the the secret of life where how come people are rich, happy and fulfilled and others are not. ANd the Secret of famous people like Napolean, Richard Branson, Famous people make it is because of one secret in life.

It is the Law of Attraction. It is our thoughts that attracts what comes to our life.

One example of a woman who had three kids aith debts of US$50K. and use the advice of the book and got out of debt and now owns a samll business and doing well.

It say "Thoughts becomes things" Our thoughts attracts us to things we want in life. If we manifest wealth and happiness, and think out it daily, these things will manifest in our life.

It ways the Law of attraction does not understand Nos, Don't and negative things. Hence if you keep saying to yourself " I don't want to be late" you are actually telling the Universe that you will be late.

This have given me a great motivation that I have set these goals and I think by writing this in this blog is is actually asking what I want for myself.

1. I want to have a new job as a Office Manager in an Events / Aerospace company that allows me to do what I do best _ planning events and administration of events and the office. An Annual income of $50,000 or more- by year 2008.

2. Be a world class photographer.

3. Have savings of $100,000 in my saving account.

4. Have a happy and wonderful family.

I know by listing these goals is not that I am boasting of what I want , it is just a self declaration of my goals and what I wnat I wnat to achieve in the future.

Please give your blessing and wish me all the best in my journey.

At least now I know what I want to achieve.

Take care and later..............

Life

Lately, I have been very frustrated about Life.

I have been wondering what I am doing working as an Administrator in Church of St Ignatius. Is working life cut out like this for the next 30 years???

I am certainly not happy and with my interest in aerospace, photography and events planning, should I forge ahead and look for work in these areas. My worry is always will anyone hire a 42 year old guy and will the pay meet up with my expectations???

Every month I am very tired of look at the dollars and cents of daily paying of bills, and it is always a struggle of whether I have enough to keep the household afloat with the bills and food for the family. every month is always scraping the bottom of the barrel to meet ends. I always feel why there are people who are enjoying life with all the high pay and here I am always not enough.

I live very simply, no car, take 3 hours each day to travel to work and back home with bus and the MRT. I feel that this takes too much of my life and it is worth it? Is there anything that can be better?

I feel like giving up so many times, and yet when I look at my family I know I have to do the best for them. What do I have to do to get out ot this trap? I think I should look for something to do - extra income -- is there anyone out there to help me? What can I do?

AHHHHHHHHHHH! I feel so frustrated - just $90 for the next week till pay day. How to survive and feel so depressed!!!!!!!!!!!!

Class Renioun - SJI - 155th Founder's Anniversary

Hi

Yesterday, 30 Apr 2007, I went for the class renioun at the Shangri-La- Island Ballroom.

Aniticipation, anxious and excited was my feeling that day. You just don't know what to expect for such an occassion. Well, I always tell myself that I will enjoy myself no matter what happens. I believe that if you have this attitude you will always have a great time. Well I did and more. You see this feeling has an anticlimax. That morning my thoughts were for my Ngee Ann Poly friend Vincent Chia's as he just lost his mother through cancer.

I heard that his mother was diagnosed with cancer in 2002 and a year later his Father was also struck with cancer. He told me that his mother with great strenght journeyed with her husband to the path of recovery - pain and then now death. They died with only a space of 4 months. My thoughts go to him that he will be strong and that we will always pray that the strength of his mother's love will be theree for his family and also something we can learn from. So much to admire.

So I went to the dinner and initially, it was quite over-whelming as there were just no one I could recognise. But later I recognise some of the Josephian Brothers and said hello to them.

Soon I saw some familar faces and these are the guys I met and are my classmates or school mates that graguated from SJI in 1980.

Anthony Mak, Chester Tham, Lennard Thean, Michael Tay, Mervy Gay, Tan Kah Chye, Slyvester Grant, Brain Campos, Martin Chua and James Choo.

Some like Anthony and Brain I have seen frequently but the rest I have not seen for at least 7 years and like Lennard for almost 30 years. I felt a sense of "smallness" as they - to me- have made it- MDs,CEO, Big Business men, and Lawyers. I felt that after 30 years they have achieved so much and yet I am still stuck in this positio in my life.

We as usually asked each other how many kids and also griped about the sad truth that our sons will never go to SJI through affliation of Christian Primary Schools, but have to get in through merit.

I gues it is just reality that firstly SJI to me at least- has somehow lost its identity as because of admission through merit a lot of the boys are not from christian schools and a lot of them as not Catholics. Not offending anyone, the boys in our time and our father's time had time unity of Old boy's is the Catholic feeling and the feeling that we were Josephians. Now even my nephews just brush off that the scholl is just a school. So sad that the tradition of sons will always joing in our alma mater will continue but now always be so because of change and the fact the SJI have to keep its independence status by its results and we understand this but it is very sad.

Well, about the feeling of the guy that is not made it got a feeling of respect from my friends that said that even with all their status they envy my position of less stree of the private world. I said that now that I am out I always have this feeling of getting into it more for the monetary gains. But some of them told me I am lucky that I must believe that God will provide.. Maybe my faith have been pretty low recently. They are right you know.

It was pretty good to see they guys and now being good at organising events I have dreamt that we should not just meet through the School but maybe a more relax manner. I am thinking of having renting a chalet at Changi this December and having a BBQ and invite as many guys as possible. To offset cost maybe we can pool our resources and get this idea to reality.

To all the guys I met it has been great seeing you again. I wish you all the success with your family and good health to you and your loved ones. Take care and keep in touch.

Later...............

155 Years - SJI Founder's Day

Wow, it has bee 30 long years since I went in St Joseph's Institution at Bras Basah Road - now the Singapore Art Museum.

Just 2 days ago, I received a call from my old classmate, Anthony Mak, that SJI is celebrating its 155 years of its Founders' Day. Just an excuse of having the guys from my class - 4 Arts 10 - to meet up. Of course, I said yes, but later have some reservations, as the costs of $100 and later my oldest daughter needed $150 for her Outward Bound Course she attend in March. There goes the budget for this month. So much to do and yet so little to spend!!!

Well, the attendence of this Founders' Day dinner on next Monday - 30 Apr 2007 at Shangri-La Hotel have brought back so many memories and also take stock of how much have happened for the last 30 years.

In 1977, going to a new school was really quite scary. I remember my parents came to see which class I was in. I remember being in Sec 1 C 10. Must be in the second last class as my Chinese was really hopeless. Well my sec 1 and sec 2 classmates had some of my classmates from primary school. I clearly now remember that we were really a bunch of motley boys. we would always made to stay back after school as we always make the most noise in between classes. And the irony is that the the beside us is the "best" class. I think it was 1 C 5.

We were so naughty that we even made 4 relief female teacher quit after a day of teaching as we always disturbed her. We even made teacher scold us for not wearing our uniforms after PE lessons. Some of my classmates will be in their underwear when the female teacher comes in for lessons. But think of it now some of the guys are now bankers or lawyers. Such irony in life.

When I went to Sec 2 I was in 1 C 9. You must think I improved but I think not, the school will place us in categories of what levels if standard you were in for your 2nd language. I was always in the worst class. we were always given this psychological tension that we will fail our O levels. even though the chinese teachers were right, I think this is like putting us in for slaughter.
I remember we were up for streaming at Sec 2. and also had to go for Tech Class at Mcnair Road every Friday. I hated going as we needed to do metal and woodwork. Sec 2 was quite a blur now, but I remember having to studying hard but I guess with my Chinese I was Destined to go to Art Class.

I made it to Sec 3 Arts 10, and we were made to be in a class that was next to the principal office. Again always had to stay back as we made one hell of noise in between class. One incident that I find weird is of having 7 classmates suspended for looking a a "dirty' Magazine. Well I recall, the magazine was passed during Science Lab class. I was sitting in the second row, and waitng to see the magazine, but never got to see it. Well, if the storey was right, some of the guys were looking at it and when one of the spotted a prefect walking by threw the magazine on the floor.

The guy that was reading the magazine was brought to the Principal's office and asked who else saw it. It was like asking him who he knows. it could be the whole school. Well, form waht I was told, someone chicken out and spill the beans and 7 guys were suspended for a week.

Well, Sec 3 and Sec 4 was the best time as we were voted by the school for having the class with the best teamworking and togetherness. Till today we still remember our "brothers" as one we will always help for anything.

I may have offended many of you guys during these 30 years, I don't mean any offence - maybe being young and hot tempered. But I will always remember our good times and hope that we will meet each other soon and connect again.

I look forward to this Monday's dinner and maybe this can be some life changing experience. Well, life is always made of experience that we can always learn from and grow from it.

I will report of what happen then, Later ...........

Going to Ngee Ann Poly

Hi

How is everyone? Good I hope. Happy Easter to one and all.

Well, when we received our GCE o Level results in 1980. I knew I only had 2 choices in life, to study in Ngee Ann Poly or do my A Levels privately. Because I did commerce as one of my O level subjects I guess gave me an advantage of doing Business Studies in Poly. Also the biggest draw is that I do not have to do Mandarin again for life. You see I scored a F9 for my Chinese.

Well, I still remember the day when we received our results in the SJI school Hall. All my classmates were just pushing each other to to be in front of the line to receive the results from our form teacher - the late Mr Lee. He seemed very pleased of our results - or from our thoughts that morning was we just passed and he had to teach us goondus again.

Before the months before the results after the O Levels, we just hung around together usually about 10 - 15 of us. Always asking each other what we'll do after the results and what we'll become years later. After receiving our results a I managed to get good enough results to enter Poly. Did well for maths, commerce, Lit, and english. I remember a few of my friends just cried their eyes out in the tuck shop. They did rather badly, some of them had to stay back, but not in SJI. (Secret, one of them is Fr Richards Ambrose). But looking back - with their rich parents those who stayed back went to study in the States and now are Bankers or Lawyers.

My class alone had 8 lawyers and one of them is now the Dean of the Law Faculty in NUS. We always say we were a bunch of guys who really knew how to talk-cock like they say. We were also a bunch of buay-yahs as you can imagine we had "love letters" with IJ girls and always had functions with girls. Such fun those days. So poor were we that we could not afford mobile discos like the youth today, but had to borrow the classmates' best sound system, and use torchlights to simulate disco lights. Ah those were really the days. The youth today must say we were so lame.

Well, I went to Ngee Ann Poly to do the Diploma In Business Studies. The first experience of studying with girls and with our raging buay-yahs, sometimes it was hard to concentrate. But I never had any girlfriends while studying in Poly. The work suited me as I was always very independent, and work was always depended on yourself. Some of my friends just left Poly after 3 month as they preferred the School - spoon fed system. I remember us schedulling our classes that we only had to come to school from Mon - Thu. Fridays was going out day - beaches, cinemas or playing squash or soccer.

One biggest incident was when one of my friends who was a "Babok - gay", dressed up as a girl and pretended to be one till graduation. He/She was even in the Poly's debating team in my first year, and the uproar from the SJI classmates when he/she was shown on TV, He even won the best speaker award - even though we did not win overall. He did this for three years and boy did he had an adventure as he went to the girls toilet and saw everything the girls did. even some of the girl class mates did not know he was a guy till we received our Diplomas in 1984.

There was even once a guy who wanted to date him. He was really a attractive gay/girl. But we out him to his senses when we told hime after he went out with him a few times. He was so shocked that he refused to talk to he/she again.

Poly was always fun as we had so much fun and time. But time can also be your biggest obstacle and you really needed to time managed or you'll just wate all the time and soon there will be no time to study.

I did many things that I was proud of in Ngee Ann Poly. One was to set up the Catholic society that it had to be registered as a Society in Singapore. You see, the menegement in Ngee Ann was very strcit in religious societies in Poly then and we had to be independent so that we will be more structured and organised. But throught he 3 years I was a bit disillusion, as I wanted to have more prayers for my members but the YCS had other objectives. I slacked off in the final year and the society only lasted for 5 years. Just one my proud and saddest achievements.

This was also the time I took up photography seriously. I was the official photographer for many events in poly - but the most challenging was with the educational Tour to the USA for 25 days. I was appointed the official photographer then and had to produce a slide show for the Travel agency and produced for the Poly after the tour. Boy those days we had to take slides negatives then and convert it with a machine as big as your photocopier now. Now we just do it with a windows programme. Till today I am still crazy over photography.

I miss my friends as we don't seem to keep in touch so much as my SJI friends. Guess it is our work and families, but we always remember the good times and friendship fostered.

I will always miss the freedom of being a student and the carefree life we had. I miss being a student and know the best time of our lives is being a students and the stories we can tell.

Till then ..........

St Joseph's Institution 1977-1980

Hi

In 1977, after struggling with my PSLE, I did not know how I passed my Chinese, but I managed to go to SJI at Bras Basah Road.

Managed to get into the 2nd last class, in Sec 1. Just show you how blur I am.

Well, I was in 1C10. Class of notorious boys who disliked studying, always caught talking loudly and made to stay back many times afer school for being so noisy that the best class (which happens to be next to us) always complained about us.

We had a real funny teacher that taught us History. His name was Mr Bernard Wong. He sometimes would carry a piece of chalk like one would hold if he was smoking. He would actually smoked the chalk!! Also, when we were doing our test, he would even tell us what page to look at to COPY!. Once my friend did not study the topic on Babylon - but decided to write about the FA cup Final that year. Guess what he scored - 75 marks.

Sec one and Two were always playing soccer and playing at Plaza Singapura. School results were always about borderline, hence, I only managed to get to an Arts class. Also because I always failed my Chinese. - Arts 10.

I gues that the turning point in my life that I realised that in order to get anything in life we have to work hard on it. My late Sec 4 form teacher, Mr Lee - died at a ripe age of 45 - never gave up on us guys who always think we would never do well in our weak subjects. For me I was very weak in Science, Only had a score of 20 marks in my Sec 3 finals. Mr Lee would sit down with us and made us believed that we could do it and believed that we can do well if we just believe in ourselves. To my surprise - I scored A2 in my Prelims, and a 3 for My O Levels.

I will always remember Mr Lee for the fun he brought in life during Sec 4. He always played with us Soccer and treated us like friends than students. Also the class is still the closest I had as friends compared to all the years of studying. I will always remember the camping trips, going to friends' house to do our ten years series, playing soccer at Fort Canning, and meeting girls at functions. Some of my classmates said that no matter what happens in life, we will always have time for us buddies in Sec 4.

I remember once when we were having my GCE O Level Chinese oral exam - I only took 5 minutes whereas, other students would take 30 minutes. You see when I was asked to read the passage I just reade the first word and the last word. Even before the invigilator asked me if I was ready I said I finished! He nearly fell off his chair. I must hold the record for the dumdest and fastest student. My friend Glen Goh who was after me just stared at me and said - "Wah so fast enh?"
everytime I said this everyone will laugh.

I will always remember the stalls at Waterloo street in the '70s that sold the Mee Soto, Mee SIam etc. Such variety. And ah the bookstores at Bras Basah, the pirated cassette tapes at the alleys. I miss the carefee life and the friends then, I am guilty of sometimes offending some of my former classmates but they will always be my friends in my heart.

Till then..........

My funny Army checkup

I just had to write this short and funny blog in case I forgot.

When I had to enlist for the NS, all of us had to go to Dempsey Road for our Medical Check up.

The things they ask us to do for this check up is always the butt of jokes for all the female population.

We had to check our weight, and as you remember I was a very skinny boy, and always the male nurses will give me a stare and a shake of the head when they read my weight.

The they checked our eyesight. It seems ridiculous for us short -sighted guys to take out our glasses to read the number on the wall. Of course we will not see anything, yet they say things like when do you see. Dumb right!!!

Well then came the part where all of us have to strip to our underwear only. No shyness now.
I don't know why but always at this part of the building - the old female officers - will always walk into here to look at us. Must be very deprived that they had to look at 18 years boys with only their underwear on., Must have given them many sore eyes...Ha Ha !!

Then we were asked to go into to see the MO (Medical Officer) in twos. I went in with one guy - who look like your typical Ah-Beng. We were then asked to take off our underwear in front of the MO and then asked the most embarassing thing in your life. Cough and then jump with your male jewels in front of not just the MO but maybe 3-4 medical male NS guys. Must be they highlights of the day.
Well, the Ah Beng, took off his underwear, and hold and behold, his bush there was dyed blond. Everyone bust out laughing and to embarassed him even more as some of the guys called their friends to come in and see the yellow - Cock hair . I will never forget the look on the Ah Bengs face. He was like a naked monkey in a shop window. The MO didn't know what to do but told him to dye it back to black.

Must the funniest check up then. But they are even more funny ones I witnessed when I was doing my NS. But will mention them later ................

My Schooling Years Part 1

My schooling years is very varied

I started my kindergarden in Sunshine Kndergarten. It was situated in a shophouse where Heeren is at now. Do you remember a shop that sold swimwear. the Kindergarden was next to it.

My memories of my kindergarden days is crying for my parents when they were dropping me off school. Sleeping lessons (yes, we had lessons on how to sleep) - must be why I like to sleep now.
My grandmother who lived at Emerald Hill, will pick me up after school. She was a typical Nonya lady that always cooked nonya biscuit like kueh bulu and kueh bangkit. My favourite but nothing like hers. we always will miss her biscuits.

My grandmother really dotted on my cousin who was 5 years older than me and she came to visit him whith all the Chinese new year goodies for him till he was 12 years ol!!

I remember going to the Singapore Chinese Girls' School tuckshop to buy lunch after school.

I was a bored boy waiting for my dad to fetch me home at about 5pm everyday. Sometimes I get my head stuck in the wooden poles at the base of the window of the typical Nonya house then.

I truly miss those days now as the house was always very cool no matter how hot the days were.
When my granmother died in the '70s. They sold off the house for peanuts then. No one could have known the value it could accumulate in the '90s when such houses were in demand.

I then was staying at Thomson Road just 2 minutes from Essex Road - St Michael's School. (Now it is call SJI jr.) Personally I am against this change as it just killed off the old school. Even if they say it is the same - who will remember St Michael's school for the next 50 years if the name has changed. Policies can change but name are very significant. Well that is my opinion.

The six years at St Michael's School to me was just fun - playing soccer before , at recess, and after school. There was this rule at the school that immediately at the end of the recess period, a bell will ring and all boys were to freeze. Yes, we were to keep still of whatever we were doing. We naughty boys especially when we were in the upper primary level. whill pose in funny position like lying on the field, pretending to be flying or jumping. Once, we even pretending to be fighting. Reminiscing, this must be the funniest time of my days in St Mike's.

Also, when it rains heavily, the entrance of the school will be flooded. Once, my good friend Eddie, and I were wlking home and suddenly he disappeared. I look for him and to my horror he fell into one of the drain. Luckily nothing happen to him just feeling very wet and embarassed.

Once, during assemblym my classmate - who is now a doctor- Named Jean - recited the Singapore pledge: He said: "We the citizens of pigs, we lived in dirty pig stys, regadless of our big bums, regardless of our breath.......". He would say this loudly for many days. Then one day, the Discipline Master called for him and asked to recite it to the whole school. Must be frightening for him then, but it always gives a good laugh now when I think of this.

I remember playing games like - "Bottle-cap fighting", marbles, throwing the coin to the line, buying planes cards to see who has the best specs. Also, eating at the school had funny items like put chilli at your koropok. Prawn Haeko - the black paste you put at your rojak - with sugar at the biggest slice of your bangkwang.

Fortunately, many of my classmates are friends till now as many of us studied together till Sec 4 - wow ten years together. That is why I always have this circle of friends - even if we don't see each other we always will call each other when we see one in the streets.

Next I will mentioned my days at St Joseph's Institution. Till then ................

"CRY BABY"

Hi again,





I always loved airplanes and from the time my dad brought me to Paya Lebar airport to look at the SIA Concorde.





It has always been my dream to be a pilot. Guess God has other plans for me as my eyes is "Cocked" my degress is about 800 degrees for both eyes. Maybe my son or daughters can be one. Will discuss this later.





Well, when I was a young 3 years old, I always hated going to the barber. As you know I stayed in KL till I was 5 years old. My dad or Mum will had to sit at the barber seat with me on their lap. You see, I was pinched badly by the cutter that looked like a crab claw - don't you remember it. (it look like a piler that had claws). see below. they always cut my hair at the back of my head with my skin.

I always cried like a pig put to the slaughter. My parents said the barbers always were afraid of me. Must be 20 minutes of hell for them. Now we have the electric ones that is so safe.

When I was young till maybe till 25 I was very skinny. My weight was like 40kg till I was 18 years. I had nicknames like skinny baby or broomstick or cricket while in school. But with drinking of Coca-Cola and eating nights snacks, I am a BIGGG 65kg now.

I have stopped drinking Coke after so and I have dropped to 62kg and a good BMI scale. I just drink green tea now. Must be afraid of looking like a pregnant man.

I leave you with this thought: If you had a choice to relive just for a day what would you want to do again in your childhood??

For me will the the days I can play soccer with my friends in primary school.

A good friend always told me : the best years are when we are schooling - just worry about our studies and ENJOY !!! the memories of my schoold days.

Till then .......

Introduction - my First 5 Years

Hi

I am starting this blog to have my say and maybe leave my thoughts for anyone who cares.

I am a father of three - 2 girls (Claire and Caroline) and a boy (Paul).

I was born in Singapore in the old Youngberg Hospital - near the Mount Vernon Columbarium. The doctor that put me in this world was Dr Tooth. When I was young and my parents drove past the hospital I awlays imagine the hospital like some horror movie.

When I was 1 year old , my Dad had to be posted to KL, so me and my sister had to "migrate for 5 years in Pertaling Jaya. Till today I ways have this attachment to PJ as I grew up there and fond memories are always with me.

Once, I remeber showing off to a neighbour that I could cycle my tricycle like a "pro". Like a 3 year old I showed her that I could cycle backwards!!. I remember my dad was preparing satay for a party - boy I remember we had big parties with many "stars" from the Malaysia Movie industry as my Uncle Jackie knew them through his horse racing circles.

Back to my cycling - I cycled backwards and then the back wheels caught the drains and I fell backwards and hit my big head at the concrete steps. So hard I hit it that the concrete broke off. (Till today, the current family staying a the old house , the step had the part of the concrete the fell off)
Of course I scream like hell, till today I remember my dad carried my to look for my mum, and told her I fell. Then, my dad realised why his hand is all wet. Then , really hell broke loose, I had a 2 inch cut at the back of my block head. They rush me to the PJ hospital, and the doctor just sewed my without any anethestic, boy I still remember the pain.

My parents begged the doctor that I don't have to stay in the hospital, but me taken care at home. Big mistake, as when I slept on the sofa that afternoon, I fell off it and had a big lump on my forhead.
Just imagine the stupid look of having a big lump on ht eforehead and a big bandage at the back. Must be the nest custome for the year. Well, till today I show my kids of the where the cut is on my head. My wife tells me that maybe by falling down, I am so "ding -dong" (My wife nickname for me)

Times at KL was always fun, so much so that even the fresh milk - the magnolia one , in the triangle packaging - was delivered to the house door step. Once, I being so fickle told my mum one moment I wanted the milk and the nest minute said no. Then I decided I wanted it the delivery man forgot to pull his hand brake and the van move into and fell into the drain. I was quite a devil then.

I also remember my relatives from Singapore came to visit, afer visiting my aunty who was a nun staying at Segamat. My mum will always ask me and my sister to collect cow dung at the back of my house. The trails of a young boy. Sometime reading the Lat comics - does bring back the memories of staying in KL.

We had to return to Singapore when the racial roits happened in the '70s. If there wasn't any roits then, I believe I will not come back to Singapore. Well, that just a thought, till the next posting I tell you about why I was a cry baby

Later........